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  • Writer's pictureCait Donovan

#straightfromcait - Stop Should'ing All Over Yourself And You Will Heal From Burnout

Updated: Oct 1, 2022

Hi Fried Fans! :) “Stop should-ing all over yourself” also known as “must-urbation”: Why you need to pay attention to the word SHOULD during your burnout recovery. I was laying on the table at my acupuncturists office and I said the thing that I just reprimanded a patient for the night before. “But, my body SHOULD be able to do this!”

And as soon as it came out of my mouth, I realized it and my shoulders dropped. Recovering from my ruptured achilles tendon and subsequent surgery over the past year and a half has been much slower and more cumbersome than I would have liked it to be. In the meantime, I’ve put on weight and I’ve started “should-ing” all over myself. I should eat better.

I should be able to exercise more.

I should create better habits.

I should I should I should. Here’s the thing: accepting the limitations that my body currently has and trying to improve in small increments works better than forcing myself past what I’m capable of and then needing extra time to recover.

The same goes for you during your burnout recovery. It doesn’t matter if you USED to be able to do something. It doesn’t matter if you’re annoyed that you’re unable right now. It doesn’t matter if you think your body SHOULD be able to do something.

Your job during burnout recovery is to use your current limitations to create your current boundaries. They will shift and widen as you heal, I promise, but when you’re starting out - you need more space, more cushion, more blank time in your schedule, more gentle movement, and more grace for your process.

Most of us that burnout stay stuck on the burnout cycle because of the Should-ing. Because we are comparing our current abilities to what we used to be able to do. Guess what? You’re burnt out. Your current abilities are less than what you’re used to and if you don’t learn how to adjust, you’ll just stay on this cycle for years and years and years. Trust me, that’s exactly what I did.

Burnout is invisible to the naked eye. There are plenty of things changing in your body and in your brain, but because you can’t see it, you don’t adjust. You just keep pushing, believing that you can because you used to be able to.

But let’s think about it a minute. When you’re burnt out, lets say that you have 40% of your normal energy. Why on EARTH should you be able to do as much as before on 60% less energy? If your gas tank was only 40% full, would you be able to drive the same number of miles as you could on a full tank?

You know how the battery on your phone empties throughout the day, little by little? I wish we had one like that for our bodies so that there was a physical, visible representation of how long we needed before needing to be recharged.

When you’re burnt out, you’re not starting the day on a full battery. If you’re burnt out and also recovering from an injury or an illness, or better, have a chronic illness, you have even less juice to start with. So here’s this week’s #straightfromcait actionable tip: Pay attention to your limits and listen to them. Stop should-ing all over yourself. Work within what you’ve got and you’ll start to recover.

Promise. If you’re not sure where your boundaries are, start taking note of all the times you tell yourself during the day that you should or must do something and then start eliminating/delegating all those jobs :) This concept and so many more uber practical tips are what make up the 200 pages of The Bouncebackability Factor, which, if you haven’t bought yet - I seriously don’t know what you’re waiting for!

Also, if you don’t think that you can possibly eliminate or delegate and you’re stuck thinking that change is impossible, please know that you’re wrong. LOL. My job is to prove this to people every single day. I’m taking 7 more clients until the end of 2020 and starting the new year with a price increase, so if you want to get in at the current rate, you should book your free call before the holidays!

Talk to you soon! Cait

P.S. Here are the most affordable ways to get more help:

1. Listen to more FRIED. Episodes, they're all right here on this website or on ANY podcast player you use - you can even ask Alexa to play them for you, just say: "Alexa, play FRIED. The Burnout Podcast!"

2. Get My #1 New Release Book The Bouncebackability Factor will light a fire under your ass, promise.

3. Snag The Resentment Journal Mini Course - For $27, you can learn to transform anger, irritation, resentment, and frustration into boundaries and spare energy :)

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