#straightfromcait: Anxious About Re-Entry? Boundary Building Skills You Must Learn NOW.
Updated: Sep 28, 2022
COVID has sucked, there’s no question about it. But at the same time, the pandemic has given us an unexpected excuse with which to better uphold our boundaries. Now that COVID regulations are loosening, this automatically acceptable justification is beginning to disappear. So, how do you uphold your boundaries even after social distancing and mask mandates are lifted?
The key is getting honest with yourself about your values. I recommend first completing my Living According to Your Core Values worksheet. This will help you identify the values that are most fundamental in your daily life. Then, I suggest creating action statements around each of these values. For example, if a value of yours is family, an action statement might be “Eat dinner together as a family 5 nights a week with no phones.”
Not only will this exercise allow you to better incorporate your values into your day-to-day life, but it will also allow you to uphold your boundaries in a clear, kind and concise way. When it comes to boundaries, it’s important to avoid white lies, passive aggression and wiggle room. By integrating your values into your life in a tangible way, you can honestly and efficiently express your boundaries to others.
Like anything, boundary building takes practice. If you need a little support along the way, I’ll be watching the hashtag #buildbetterboundaries all week to help clear up your boundary statements (if you’re brave enough to write some!) and make sure there are no thorns, no lies and no wiggle room!
This is one of the most important skills you need to recover from burnout and prevent it in the future. You’ve got this!
“So, how do you keep the pieces of the pandemic that really worked for you and still have space for adding some community time, friendship time and extended family time to your calendar?...You start by getting really honest about your values.” (2:44-3:01)
“When you are able, with clarity, to define your values, your decision making process becomes easier and then the language you use to build boundaries becomes clearer and it becomes easier for you to say, easier for you to share and easier for other people to accept and just move on from.” (3:29-3:50)
“When boundaries are well-stated, they are clear, kind and concise...When boundaries are well-stated, they avoid lies, thorns and wiggle room.” (7:30-7:47)
“The more you practice...making sure your boundaries are clear, kind and concise, the easier it becomes because you realize that it actually improves all of your relationships. No one’s wondering if they’re putting you out because you’re not letting anybody put you out. You’re not worrying if somebody’s pushing you too far because you don’t let people push you too far. The boundaries that you create speaking this way will make all of your relationships better if you give it enough time.” (10:41-11:13)
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait